Friday, December 31, 2010


I've been spoiled. The more I research derby online the more I realize it.
I'm spoiled because I made it onto one of the best roller derby teams in the world.

Maybe I shouldn't beat myself up about it though. No disrespect or discouragement to any ladies who long to skate derby, but I've read multiple accounts online of girls who are working on trying to do crossovers. Working. Trying. What?
Yes, I worked and I tried, but I learned to skate a crossover during my first roller derby workshop in RENTAL SKATES. Yes. And no, I didn't play ice or roller hockey. I roller skated as a kid - that was it.
What's the lesson here? I don't know. I guess I'm just glad that I live in a city with really great and experienced skaters or I'd be so bored with waiting for my fellow teammates to learn how to crossover.

You'll probably also hate me when I tell you that I can crossover while going clockwise too. And nope, I didn't even have to learn how to do that. It came naturally to me as a lefty.
Backwards crossovers? My second try I was able to do them, both directions. Now, I'm still working on being able to use them to pick up more speed...

I'm not just writing all of this to brag. Really, I don't mean to brag. I'm pretty surprised that I can do these things so easily. A lot of credit goes to my coaches, without them I wouldn't know what to practice.

What to practice if you don't have great coaches like mine:
If you want to learn how to crossover first you MUST master being able to skate on just your left leg and on just your right leg. And no, I don't mean just on the straightaways, I mean you should ALSO be able to skate around the turns (as sharply as the lines are) on one leg. Only then can you talk to me about trying to do a crossover. This goes for backwards skating too.

Everything everything everything EVERYTHING in skating is all about balance. Some moves you will perform you're moving your center of gravity 5 different times and directions in a matter of seconds. If you can't skate on one foot - how do you think you can move your center of gravity that much, that fast without falling? Or even if you don't manage to fall, you sure won't be aggressive because you're too busy trying not to lose your balance.

Get over yourself. Everyone falls.

Now get out there and skate! Skate skate skate. And if you are outdoors, go with a buddy. I went by myself once and wiped out. Luckily I had full gear on, but I still scraped all of the skin off of one of my thumbs. Not pretty.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Cut Results

Dear Blogosphere,
I made it!!!! I'm officially fresh meat!!!! Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010


Tonight the journey could end... Tonight we have our pre-cut assessments. If I fail tonight, then tomorrow I could receive an email informing me that I have been cut. And I will cry. A lot. And I will have a very unmerry Christmas.

But I don't anticipate that. I think I will get an email that says they have officially, formally accepted me as fresh meat. I've volunteered, I've worked my butt off during practices, gone to 40 plus hours of extra practice time on the rink (since October I should add), attended strength training, read the rule book 2.5 times, attended tons of bouts, watched even more hours of derby online, researched derby even more often... I cannot possibly do ANY more than I have done. I will have done by very best.

Tomorrow I find out if it was enough.

But I'm pretty sure it is. I could get my strength up more, but that will come in time, as the vets can recognize.

Here goes!!!!

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Time flies

Hi blog,
Sorry I've neglected you recently, but life, work, side projects, derby, holiday prep, friends, parties, etc. takes up a lot of time! But derby is undoubtedly my favorite thing from that list!! I'll have to report on the last three or something practices at a later date because I'm too busy until after Christmas. However...

I'm EXTREMELY proud to announce that today I did crossovers while skating backwards! It was amazingly easy when I tried it this time around - I credit that to Teflon Donna for making us skate backwards on one leg during the beginning of Monday's practice. I practiced that this morning and after I felt more confident with that, I tried to do a crossover at the turn and was amazed at my success! Then I did it for 20 minutes straight or something. As time went on, I started to be able to dig down for more momentum and push from it! I love skating backwards!!!!!

Monday, December 13, 2010

DNN 2010 Reader Poll noms

In response to this:

Most Valuable Jammer

Atomatrix (Oly)
Bonnie Thunders (Gotham)
Carmen Getsome (Rat City)
DeRanged (Rocky Mountain)
Kelley Young (Kansas City)

Most Valuable Blocker

Anya Heels (Rat City)
Bruz-Her (Kansas City)
Demanda Riot (Bay Area)
Joy Collision (Charm City)
Sassy (Oly)

Rookie of the Year

I.M. Pain (Charm City)
Jalepeno Business (Rat City)
Lil' Paine (Boston)
Skittle (Brew City)
Urrk'n Jerk'n As Booty Blockya (Rocky Mountain)

Bout of the Year

Rose City 133, Bay Area 129 (August, Hometown Throwdown)
Charm City 152, Boston 136 (August)
Bay Area 136, Denver 127 (Western Regionals)
Kansas City, 157, Texas 127 (South Central Regionals)
Rocky Mountain 147, Oly 146 (WFTDA Championships)

Best Rivalry

Charm City / Boston
Gotham / Philly
Rat City / Rose City
Rocky Mountain / Oly
Texas / Kansas City

Most Improved Team

Chicago Outfit
Rocky Mountain

Best Venue

Dorton Arena (Raleigh, NC)
Key Arena (Seattle, WA)
Roy Wilkins Auditorium (St. Paul, MN)
Sacramento Memorial Auditorium (Sacramento, CA)
UIC Pavilion (Chicago, IL)

Best Regular-Season Event

Wild West Showdown (February, Bremerton, WA)
East Coast Extravaganza (June, Feasterville, PA)
Battle on the Bank (June, Del Mar, CA)
Rollercon (July-August, Las Vegas, NV)
Hometown Throwdown (August, Portland, OR)

Best Announcer

D'Nouncer Duane Cunningham
Dumptruck (only because he's announced more games nationally, otherwise I'd say Hymen Heaven)
Hymen Heaven
Jim "Koolaid" Jones
Val Capone

Friday, December 3, 2010

Derby eats

One of the neat/annoying things about roller derby is that now I have to eat 4-5 full meals a day. Tonight I ate at Wendy's. I know. Don't judge me - it's Friday!
I had a cheeseburger, fries, and two order of chicken nuggets with Oreos for dessert. Do you people realize that one hour of skating eats up 300 or more calories????? And the kind of skating we do - wouldn't be surprised if it eats 600 calories each hour! No joke.
Actually, I can't just drink water during practice, I have to half it with Gatorade or else I start to feel faint because I naturally burn carbs very fast already, but derby practice quantifies that process to the max! And I'm getting into the habit of eating chicken, salad, and a serving of quinoa for dinner before practice, then a banana in the car on the way over. Still, by the end of practice, I am hungry and must eat a second dinner. My roommates say that I sound like a hobbit when I talk like that :)
I mostly love this, mostly because sometimes I don't like to eat. I remember in high school during softball season - just eating and eating and eating because I wanted to be bigger so I could hit the ball further. I didn't really get bigger, other than what I would have become naturally, but it was fun to eat two bagels for breakfast instead of just one. It took me years to get myself out of that particular habit. Now I'm diving back in because, once again, I want to be bigger, this time so I can hit harder, but I'm being smart about it. I'm eating lots of protein so my muscles will grow thick and strong. Nobody is gonna mess with me! :)